I knew she was the one
by brittanaismylife
Summary: Santana got pregnant with Brittany is it true? Santana has to move to New York because she had to get away from Brittany and from the hate but 4 years later does the Beautiful blonde and the Gorgeous Brunette get back together?
1. the truth

Chapter 1

The Truth

Walking into the choir room I knew I had to tell the club the secret I've been hiding not only from them but from Brittany as well. I speed walked over to my seat next to Brittany. 'Santana you wanted to tell us something right?' Mr Shue said in that tone he always used when he was in a good mood. 'Uh-hh yeh' I stuttered as I nervously looked at my beautiful girlfriend that was sat next to me. At that moment I knew I could lose the love of my life or id make her extremely happy.

'As you know me and Britt-britt have been dating for 3 years now and there's something I need to tell you all' 'if your just going to tell us that you and your girlfriend had sex in the football field I don't wanna know thanks' Racheal shouted ' Wait what we've never had sex in the football field' I screamed confusingly. 'Sorry Santana I only told her that to get her of my back' Kurt whispered as he laughed to Quinn. 'Anyways you know I love you Britt and I wanted to tell you infront of our family' 'I'm pregnant and you're the mum'.

I scrunched my eyes as I didn't want to hear their reaction. I clenched my fists and waited. 'Santana you cheated on me' 'with who?' 'I can't believe you have done this to me' 'especially with a man'. At that point I had opened my eyes as I seen tears ran down Brittany's face. She screamed and ran out of the room. I fell on the floor forcing my fists to punch the floor. 'Santana it's okay I'm here for you' 'how many months are you?' I looked up I whipped my eyes because they were just full of tears. I couldn't believe that Finn Hudson is actually there for me.


	2. Lonely

Chapter 2

Lonely

I couldn't bare not having Brittany to cuddle at night and not going on our cute little Friday night dates. I haven't even told my parents. I'm 8 months pregnant I'm not even showing, I need to move somewhere no one will find me. Ever since I was 5 years old I've wanted to move to New York. Yes New York.

4 years later

'Mommy, are we there yet?' Ava shouted as she pointed to her best friend Emelia. Honestly I've never seen someone be so excited for pre-school. 'Yes, Princess you got your lunch box?' 'Yes Mommy can I go now' Ava said with her angry face, which I knew that I needed to get out the car haha. Suddenly I felt this soft hand grab mine, I looked down to see Ava with a massive smile on her face 'you ready?' Nodding her head Ava ran to Emelia. 'Ahh miss Lopez, how you doing today' 'I'm fine thank you Mrs Odell, can you make sure that Ava gets her medicine please?' 'Sure thing'. Mrs Odell is Ava's teacher.

Ava was born 1 month premature, she was under weight, small, beautiful and the spitting image of me and Brittany. It ward hard Bringing my little princess up because being premature she has dyslexia so she finds it hard to talk to people and to do her work.

Home alone again, I seriously need a job but Ava's only just started pre-school, so I haven't really had chance to look for one. I've dreamed about being in films or Broadway. Anyways I do what I do every day sit watch films and think about what I'd be doing with Brittany still in my life.

Waking up at the sound of my phone ringing. ' Miss Lopez, I'm sorry but Ava has been sick can you come and pick her up please.' My face turns from tired to worry. My little girl is never sick so why is she now? I grab my keys and head to the school. 10 minutes later I seen Ava asleep in her teachers arms, picking her up and feeling her cuddle into my chest . 'lets go home and watch movies does that sound good?' ' Mommy I wanna look out the window and see New York.'

Ava loves living in New York, since its only me and her we'll sit and watch traffic go by. 'we're home now go get in your pjs'. As I smile and look out of the window, I hear loud footsteps then I feel this small thing cuddle into me. I look down and I see these bright blue eyes look into mine, running my hand through Ava's brown wavy hair, thinking to my self how beautiful mine and Brittany's daughter is. If only Brittany believed that I didn't cheat on her, she'd still be with us. Ever since I last seen her walk out I've cried my self to sleep. Yes I'm still in love with her 4 years after she broke my heart.


	3. will my life change?

Chapter 3

Will my life change?

Knowing that I had to get a job killed me because I just wanted to stay at home and wait till Ava got home from school, so we could go out to the park or play. That morning I made myself apply for the café down in Greene Street which is a couple of blocks away.

'Hey I'm here to give in my application form for the job that's going here.' I said with that look of oh I can't be bothered face. 'I'll be with you in a sec I'll just serve this customer.' Confused I recognised that voice, the man behind the counter turned around to grab the form. It was Finn Hudson. I smiled as I hugged him over the counter. 'Hey I haven't seen you in ages what are you doing here?' I wondered why Finn Hudson the quarterback was working in a café?

'Santana Lopez, I'm helping Quinn out, she was short of staff so I guessed I should help her out, as she's my fiancé'. Wait what Finn and Quinn? 'what happened to you and Racheal?' I whispered laughing into my hand. 'it doesn't matter, I'll give this to Quinn.' Finn said to avoid any further questions. 'Santana, we should meet up one day I've got a lot to tell you about Britt, and the New directions, hey Mr Shue got married!'. When I heard Brittany's name I felt butterfly's in my stomach. I knew that I still loved Brittany. 'Yeah sure what about tomorrow I've got the little one she's not at school teacher training is it alright if I bring her along'. Finns face dropped, I knew that he forgot that I had a baby. Why though I bet the day after I left I was the one everyone talked about.

'Sure'. I headed for the door, in owe that I just met Finn Hudson after everything that happened. What could of happened to Brittany while I was gone, I just hope nothings happened to her. I feel like crap now. I'm so scared.

A couple hours later.

'Mommy can Georgia come round please and we can bake cakes and play dress up'. 'Mommy please, please, please.' Ava screamed as she grabbed onto my leg with her puppy dog eyes. She's so beautiful I don't know what I'd do without her she's my world. 'Okay princess go and get the phone'. Whispering as I bent down to Ava's height, running my hand through her dark brown wavy hair. Seconds later I see Ava come plodding in talking to Georgia about what their gunna do while she's over. 'Ava baby hand me the phone now!' I shouted playfully'. 'Don't be horrible to Georgia or I'll go all lima heights on you'. I burst out laughing at what mini me has just said forgetting that Georgia was on the phone. 'San babe that's why I love you so much lol' 'I love you to Georg so is it okay if you come over then?' 'of course I can!'

Ava runs to her bedroom to get ready for Georgia to come over. Honestly I think Georgia loves her more than she loves me. 'San, its only me'. 'Auntie Georgia! Can we make cakes and play dress up you can be the princess in white and I can be the princess in blue okay'. Ava cheekily screamed at Georgia. 'You go find the aprons and get everything ready okay while I talk to Auntie Georg'. Nodding her head Ava headed straight to the Kitchen. 'Hey babe you alright, thanks for coming over I need to get things out of my head for a bit'. 'It's okay I'm always here for you and you know that, look I know you love Britt and you think about her 24/7 and I could tell you to stop all of this but I know you won't'.

Thinking about everything that Georgia's said it makes sense I shouldn't care about Brittany but I do, I shouldn't still love her but guess what I do. 'Thanks Georg, guess who I bumped into'. Georgia looked at me confused, 'Finn Hudson, he was working at the American Diner on Greene Street, he said there was so much to tell me and that we should meet up'. Georgia leaned over to hug me and whispered into my ear 'look we'll talk about this when Mrs is in bed okay?' I nodded as I walked over to my bed room to get my bag. 'Mommy I haven't taken my medicine!' Ava screamed through the hall way. 'Okay princess get Auntie Georgia to help you Mommy's just going shopping okay.

2 hours later

'I'm home'. Ava comes running to me, I lifted her up, she cuddled into my neck sucking her thumb. It melted my heart, she's so beautiful. 'I think it's time for bed princess'. Whispering into her ear while walking into her bedroom, which was covered in princesses and dolls. 'Get in your pjs and brush your teeth then I'll read you a story'. Ava comes plodding in then plonked herself on her bed. Telling her about her about Brittany and me when we were best friends, as she closed her eyes I kissed her forehead and silently walked out of the room.

'what do you think Finns going to tell you about Brittany, if she's got a new girlfriend or she's still hooked over you, I mean she was in love with you as much as you were with her'. Georgia stuttered softly. 'Shhhh don't say that, I honestly don't know, I can't be dealing with this I've had enough, I don't even want to go, it's not worth it they weren't there for me why should I care about them?' sobbing so much that I don't think Georgia heard me. ' Look you have to go, Brittany could be trying to find you, trying to find Ava, even if she didn't love you any more, she could still want to see her daughter'. 'Yeh but I didn't seem like she wanted to even know her, she obviously doesn't care'. 'look go to sleep okay, I'll stay the night.


	4. meeting 1

Chapter 4

Meeting 1

Being woken up by the smell of pancakes and Ava jumping on me was the best (well apart from Ava jumping on me), knowing that people cared about me. 'Mommy wake up breakfasts ready!' Ava screamed as she jumped around my room trying to get me up. 'Princess I'm up I'm up' 'Georgia's got breakfast ready for us mommy' she chuckled as she skipped of out the room.

'Ahh morning sleepy head Lopez'. Georgia said as she smirked at me, 'haha very funny, thanks for looking after her while I was asleep, and thanks for this' I whispered as I smiled into my shoulder. Still smiling I walked over to the cupboard to reach Ava's medicine. 'Av come here baby girl take your medicine' I said as I grabbed a glass of orange juice, 'Mommy, why do I have to always take this for I don't like it' Ava cried 'You know when you were born, you were a month early and you know you have trouble with being under weight and with your little brain not helping you with your words?' I paused as I saw tears run down Ava's face, 'Ava why are you crying for?' I said whipping her tears away. 'Emelia doesn't take this and all my other Friends don't take this why do I have to take this?' 'Princess you're different, but guess what that's a good thing, I love the fact your different, Georgia loves the fact your different'. 'I still love you no matter what okay?' 'Okay mommy' 'take your medicine, then eat your pancakes!' I shouted playfully.

10 minutes later

'Santana you can't avoid me, just because you don't want to talk about the conversation we had last night!' Georgia said as she grabbed my arms. 'What conversation, the one about when me and Brittany had sex then all of a fucking sudden she gets me pregnant, then when I tell her she fucking walks out because she doesn't want to be there her daughter or her girlfriend? Oh yeah that one!' I screeched as I ran out of my bedroom to find Ava. 'Look San, your meeting Finn in an hour your gunna have to speak about it anyway, just listen to me' Georgia cupped her hand at my neck 'I've never met Brittany but I know for a fact no matter what she loves that girl even if she doesn't love you anymore, she loves that girl that's the main thing!' 'What if she doesn't love her, what if she's never even thought about her?' I shouted back. 'Of course shes gunna think about her she needs to think about her to think about ever sorting it out' 'I bet she thinks about being with you and Ava every day, because I know I would' Georgia stated as she pointed her finger at me.

Looking down at my phone to see my background as Ava, I knew I had to face Finn and everybody else. 'Okay, I'm sorry for shouting at you, it's just hard.' Georgia smiled at me, that's when I knew she had forgiven me.

'Ava, we're going in a min go and get your coat on.' I shouted down to Ava. 'No San its okay I'll look after her while you go and meet Finn' 'Are you sure?' Georgia nodded as she pulled me in to give her a hug.

Half an hour later

I finally arrived at That New York Place, which is where I was meeting Finn. I strolled in grabbed a table and ordered a drink, as I saw Finn walk in the building. My stomach turned as I became really nervous to hear what he had to say. 'Santana, you're early!' Finn waved as he chuckled. 'Yes I've changed a lot in the past four years'. After I said that I knew I made things extremely awkward. 'I'm sorry I didn't mean that' 'It's okay san trust me.' I felt so sick.

'I've missed you so much Santana, we've all missed you.' Finn whispered making sure that I still heard him. 'I've missed you, sss-should I be scared about today?' stuttering as I looked down at my fingernails. 'No defiantly not' 'I know your scared because we haven't spoken to you in at least 4 years.' 'Yeah don't remind me.' I said with attitude. 'Anyways Santana, Mr Shue got married last year to Emma and Blaine n' Kurt are married as well.' 'What about Tina?' I silently shouted to Finn. 'Yeah, she's with Artie in LA, I think she's doing some modelling while Arties at film college.' 'Mercedes has her own album now, I think she's got a song featuring 2 Chainz and Big Sean lol.' We both burst out laughing knowing that everyone is going to look at us. 'I gotta listen to it then, I'm glad they're all doing good.' I said as I smiled.

'Hey Sam also got a job doing modelling in Miami' 'Also Mike is dancing at that dance college he wanted to go to.' Finn said as he had that famous smile on his face. 'What about Brittany?' I knew we had to speak about her at some point. Feeling so nervous. 'Erm Brittany, she's also dancing she's a professional now.' 'Good, I'm glad she's doing what she loves I just' 'Wait Santana there's something else I need to tell, She's also not doing so good, She misses her daughter.' Finn said with sympathy. 'Her daughter, she hasn't even met her before, how can she say she's her fucking daughter.' I can't believe she's saying Ava's her daughter even though she has never seen her, she wasn't even there when she was born. 'No matter what Santana what's your daughter's name?'

'Ava her names Ava.' I whispered. 'Oh that's a beautiful name, anyway no matter what San, Ava's always going to be Brittany's daughter' 'I think you should come back to Ohio with me and Quinn.' Finn insisted. 'No I couldn't do that, it'll be too hard, no.' I snapped. 'Don't do it for your sake do it for Ava, Ava needs her other Mom'. Finn added.

'She doesn't even know that she has another Mom, she's only four, how do I tell her that she has a mom instead of a Dad?' crying into Finns arms. 'Hey can I come back with you to meet her, then I'll help you tell her.' Finn gently told me as he kissed my forehead. 'Of course you can that would help me a lot and can Quinn come I haven't seen her in agesss.' I giggled. 'Yeh let me call her.' Finn added.

Wow I was going to tell my daughter that she had another Mom. That was the hardest part, she might not like it. I was so scared of losing my daughter.

'So San what's Ava like, is she a little Santana Lopez?' He chuckled. 'She is but she is also a little Britt-Britt, She has black wavy hair, blue eyes and a cute little smile' I Stated, 'you'll fall in love with her when you first see her, because I did.' I giggled. 'But when she was born, she was under weight and she has learning disabilities, her weight can fall so low you can see her bones and then the next minute she can be really healthy' I paused as I whipped my tears away from my eyes. I haven't really told anyone about this. 'The doctors know that I'm feeding her the right stuff, she has a meal in the morning, at lunch and at night but i just don't get it bringing her up was hard it still is, but I ain't giving up because I'm her mother she needs me.' I cried.

'it has been hard, you're not alone anymore, Quinn's here now.' Finn reassured. Finn wrapped his arm around my shoulder to reassure me that everything was going to be okay. All of a sudden I seen a mad person come running towards me and giving me a hug. 'OMG! Santana Lopez I've missed you so much, how have you been forget that get in the car we'll talk in there?' Quinn shouted in happiness.

As we arrived at the house the nerves were back, I was about to tell my daughter about her having a mom? Fuck fuck fuck. We all got out the car and headed to the door, I grabbed my keys to open it. Meanwhile I hear a little voice coming from inside. It made me smile because she's my world. 'Mommy you're home, I missed you.' Ava Screeched as she ran into my arms. 'Omg princess I missed you to you had a good time with Auntie Georgia?' I smiled into my daughters head. 'yeah It was amazing, we watched princesses and we ate chocolate!' 'But Mommy who are these people?' Ava said confused. Here we go omg I have to tell her soon. 'Hi my names Finn and this is Quinn, what's yours cheeky monkey?' Finn smirked. 'Hello there, my names Ava nice to meet you.' Ava shouted playfully. We all burst out laughing. 'Hiya there beautiful, my names Quinn!.' Quinn added. 'Hiya, my names Ava!'

After all that talking I realised that Georgia wasn't in the hall with us. 'Georgia would you like to come and meet some old friends from Mckinley?' I shouted into the living room. 'Come into the living room, would you like a drink?' I insisted inviting them into my New York home. 'Iced tea okay?' They both nodded.

Walking into the kitchen I turned around and I saw Finn playing with Ava. I was kind of glad that I met him when I did because he's got me back on my feet. 'Here you go.' I said as I passed the drinks to Finn and Quinn. 'Hi guys I'm Georgia, I've been friends with Santana since she moved here, I've heard so much about you, Finn and Quinn right?' 'yeah that's right, its nice to meet you Georgia.' Quinn smiled. 'Yes and you' 'Santana I gotta go and meet my brother.' 'Okay I'll walk you out.' Santana said playfully. 'its okay, ive been coming here for 4 years now I practically live here, bye.'

'Ava baby we have to tell you something, I have to tell you something.' I stated as I pulled Ava onto my lap. 'look princess you know your Daddy right?' Ava nodded as she looked really bored. 'You haven't got daddy baby' I paused as I felt a soft small hand wipe my tears away. 'Carry on Mommy.' Ava insisted. I brought my self to tell her, I couldn't not tell her now. 'You know Brittany the one I'm always crying about the one you ask about in photos on the shelves and on my phone?' ' That's your other Mommy Princess.'

Silence fell in the room for at least a minute, the tension was horrible! 'Mommy I got another Mommy to play princesses with?' We all laughed so much that Finn fell to the floor! 'yes baby another one!' 'And guess what, we're going back to Mommy's home town to meet her and some off my old friends!'

I could see the excitement in my princesses face. This is it I cant wait for my daughter to see her Mommy.


	5. Back to Ohio

Chapter 5

Back to Ohio

Waking up at my alarm that I didn't set, I opened my eyes and checked my phone. To find that Quinn had set it saying 'wake up bitch I forgot to tell you that you got the job!' I totally forgot that I had applied because I was too busy thinking about meeting Finn and what he had to tell me.

Bringing myself to get up, I walked over the landing towards Ava's room. 'Ava princess it's time to get up, what do you want for breakfast beautiful?' 'Mommy I'm tired ima go all Lima Heights' Ava groaned trying to get me to walk out of the room. 'Come on baby, I arranged you to go to Emelia's today while I'm at work and guess who's gunna be there!' I said playfully as I tickled Ava's belly. 'Millie and Lily, your gunna have a little play date okay.' 'Yay Millie and Lily!' 'Mommy when can I see Mommy?' Ava whispered into my ear pretending that it was a secret that she didn't want her dolls to hear. 'Hopefully tonight baby, tonight.' I softly said kissing my daughters head. 'I love you princess, more than anything.'

An hour later

'Ava baby you ready, get your coat and your Jordan's we're going now.' I said shouting up the stairs. I heard the theme tune to Tangled, looking down it was Georgia. 'What up dawg what yah doin' Georgia giggled. 'Hi Georgia why you calling I thought you would be asleep' 'I just wanted to say good luck on your first day!' Georgia reminded me how much I missed the new directions they we're family, I wanna be a family again. 'Thanks babe.' I smirked. 'its okay, are you looking forward to tonight, Ima miss you baby.' Georgia cried. 'I guess so, I'm just scared to see Britt, ima miss you to but we're gunna come back.' I crumbled softly. 'I know I'm gunna go and leave you to it bye love you.' 'love you too.'

'Ahh Santana! Where's Ava?' Emilia screamed. 'She's in the car Emelia I'll go get her yeah.' I softly spoke. 'Ava baby, Emelia's waiting for you.' Whispering as I got Ava out of the car. Seeing Ava with her friends made me happy because after what she's been through, its amazing to see her interact with kids her age. 'Okay princess, I'm going to work than I'm gunna pack and then we're going to Grandma and Papi okay.' Cupping my hand in Ava's neck I kissed her lips and gave her a hug. 'Bye Mommy, good luck at your new job, I love you.' Walking away I smiled as I looked over my shoulder to see Ava and her friends play with their dolls.

'Santana, you're early again!' ' You'll be working behind the counter okay' Finn screamed across the café. 'And what was that supposed to mean Hudson.' crossing my arms I gave Finn the most dirtiest look. I did it for a joke obviously because I didn't want to lose my job. I haven't worked this hard since the cheerio's, how is this even harder than the cheerio's?' 'Lopez!' 'Work that fuckin ass off!' Quinn joked. 'Oi oi oi I'm trying to ok!' A couple of hours later I was slaking because I just kept thinking about meeting with people I haven't seen in four years.

After work I drove home to start packing, the things that was going through my head, I was scared. I guess I always thought that this would be hard but not this hard.

Wanting to look amazing for Brittany I packed everything that made me look sexy, I had to look sexy for my Britt-Britt! After packing everything I wanted to pack, I started on Ava's but I seriously didn't know which princess dolls take so I packed all of them because I know what Ava can be like, I laughed to myself looking like a right weirdo! The excitement rose in my body but when it hit the nerves I felt a knot it my stomach, it didn't hurt it just felt really weird. Reaching for my phone I saw a text from Finn.

Hey Santana, Is it alright if I pick Ava up so we get to bond before we go back to Ohio and then I'll come pick you up. - Finn

Sure that would help me a lot thanks I'll be ready for 5 ok – Me

Ok Be ready early! – Finn

I have half an hour until Finn comes, I need alcohol! I kept thinking to myself but I didn't want the smell alcohol for when I see my parents or Brittany. Suddenly I heard the door knock, so I strolled to the door to find Georgia standing there. 'Hey babe, what are you doing here?' I screamed as I hugged her. 'I just wanted to say bye face to face!' 'when I say I'm going to miss you I really mean I'm going to miss you' We both laughed as I kissed Georgia's cheek. 'Aww ima miss you to.' 'Look Santana I'm glad you're going to see Brittany I want you to be happy.' For a minute I thought that this was going somewhere, but would Georgia do that could she fancy me? No she couldn't could she? 'Thanks Georg it means a lot seriously.' 'Hahaha oh look Finns here so I guess this' goodbye.' 'I guess bye babe I'll call you later.'

This is it. 'Mommy you ready to go see Mommy!' Ava giggled. 'I guess so baby I guess so.'

2 hours later

'Santana, wake up we're here.' Quinn whispered into my ear. Hearing her voice I jumped up to see my parents outside their house waiting for us. 'Wait what are they doing her I'm not ready no.' I screamed as I forced my hands onto my face. 'Calm down Santana I called them because I figured they were the first people you should see.' Finn said softly. I knew he was right, they would be the first ones to understand. Jumping out of the car I ran towards my Mom and Dad. 'Mami, Dad I'm so so so so sorry for ever leaving you, I have a daughter can we go inside and I'll explain.' I screamed as I pushed my head into my Moms head. 'Sanni, it's going to be okay bring her in and you can explain everything!' My Mom insisted. 'Ava baby come and meet Grandma and Papi.' The next minute I see my beautiful daughter run up to my Dad, I could see that they we're going to get on great! 'Hello, Grandma and Papi my names Ava!' Ava choked because she was so excited. 'Hey Ava I'm your Papi and this is your Grandma!' 'Would you like a cookie princess?' My Dad joked, Ava nodded as she ran straight for the kitchen.

'Mom, Brittany got me pregnant I don't know how but she did.' 'When I found out I hid it for 7 months, I didn't show which was a good thing because I couldn't let you down' 'So when I finally told Britt, she thought I had cheated and she went mental, but she wasn't the only one the glee club didn't like it either' 'That day I packed my things, then the very next day I left.' Crying into my hands I felt soft lips touch my cheek. 'It's ok Mommy, I'm here I love you loads.' Ava said reassuring me. 'Where did you go Sanni?' My mum asked. 'I went to New York, then a couple of weeks later I gave birth to Ava, she was premature.' 'Sanni baby it's ok, I understand you were scared, I still love you no matter what I'm just glad you're here.'

Phew thank God that's over I kept thinking to myself I kind of knew my mum wouldn't care. 'I made food!' 'Finn, Quinn stay for something to eat!' My Mom laughed. 'Are you sure Mrs Lopez?' Quinn asked. 'More the merrier Quinn.' She insisted. After dinner my Mom told me to go and see Brittany. Was I ready to go and see her, no but I knew at some point I had to, firstly I needed to put Ava to bed. 'Santana I'll put Ava to bed, she seems to like me.' My Dad chuckled. 'Ok Pops, Ava baby I'm going out Papi's taking you to bed, I love you and I'll see you in the morning.' Ava nodded as she walked away, I knew she didn't care she was too busy.

Heading straight for Brittany's Moms house, I felt nerves all over my body. When I Arrived, memories came flooding back, of all the times me and Britt have spent together. Getting out of the car, I stumbled towards the door. Knocking the door, as quiet as I could because I was so scared. Unfortunately Brittany heard it. 'Hey Brittany I've missed you baby.' I screamed. There was silence until Brittany spoke. 'Santana, I shouted at you for a reason so I think that you should leave.'


	6. meeting 2

Chapter 6

Meeting 2

Waking up and feeling my face swollen because of all of the crying I had done. Brittany basically rejected me, I kind of knew that this was going to happen, I wasn't ready to be hurt like this, ok it's been 4 years but I've been through a lot with Ava. I don't want to do this anymore.

Turning over to have Ava lying next to me, I curled up next to her to feel her cuddle back. 'Mommy are you okay?' Ava whispered into my ear. 'I'm fine princess, go back to sleep baby its early.' I yawned. Even though I knew that I couldn't get back to sleep, but I didn't want to wake Ava up. Reaching over to get my phone, trying not to wake Ava up, I text Quinn.

Hey Quinn is it ok for Ava and I to come over to yours today please? - Me

Sure, San of course do we need to talk? – Quinn

Hell Yeah I'll come around 2. – Me

Let's make that 12 babe, I'll make lunch! – Quinn

And cocktails! – Me

Non-alcoholic around Ava of course! – Quinn

'Santana, I know you're up you never stay in bed past nine o'clock unless you have a hangover.' My Mom said as she smiled at me. 'And you missy I know you're awake I can see you with one eye open and one closed' 'Both of you come down stairs, I made pancakes!.' I giggled as Ava jumped up when she heard the word pancakes. 'Granddar can I have strawberries and a narna on my pancakes.' Ava asked as waved her finger down the stairs. 'Of course you can, your my baby's baby, you can have anything you want.' 'But I'm your granddaughter right?' Ava said confused. 'Of course you are beautiful.' My Mom whispered softly. As we all walked into the kitchen I stood there still feeling uncomfortable because I was away for so long, I couldn't bare being that person that left for four years because she was scared. 'Santana, would you like coffee and pancakes?' 'I'll just have coffee then I'll have pancakes after Mrs over here.' 'there's loads , here eat your pancakes and drink your coffee.'

'Mommy I need my medicine.' Ava insisted. Shit I totally forgot to tell Mom about Ava! 'Medicine?' Mom said confused. 'There you go baby, and I forgot to tell you yesterday' 'Ava was born premature and when she was born she was severely underweight and then when she turned 3 and started pre-school, she found it hard to read and write' 'so I took her to the doctors she has dyslexia and they couldn't find out why she changed from being underweight to being a healthy then being underweight again' 'The doctors know that it wasn't anything I was doing, so they gave her these tablets then she has to take them for the rest of her life.' I answered. 'Oh Santana I'm sorry.' 'It's ok Mom trust me.'

After breakfast Ava and I went upstairs to get ready. Still thinking about Brittany from last night. 'Ava brush your hair, then get your Jordan's and your coat. 'Mommy are we going to see Mommy?' Ava smiled. 'No baby we're going to see Quinn.'

San I'm outside. – Quinn

Picking Ava up I rushed towards the door. 'Mom we're going to Quinn's!' I shouted running out the door. 'Ok babe don't go anywhere near B-R-I-T-T-A-N-Y with Ava!' My Mom had to spell Brittany's name out because she didn't want Ava to ask questions. 'Hi San you ok.' Quinn softly asked. 'I'm doing great, we've got a lot to talk about.' I said as I rolled my eyes. 'And I've got a lot to explain take Ava back to your Mom I've got things to tell you in private.' Quinn gulped. 'okay come on princess lets go see Grandma.' I took Ava back to my Mom, then I rushed back to the car. We soon arrived at Quinn's, we both got out the car pretty quick but then I seen Quinn walk so slow. Honestly I've never seen someone walk so slow, but I know Quinn is hiding something because she always walks like that.

The next minute I seen Finn open the door 'Santana Lopez, you're early!' Quinn screeched. 'Hey Finn where are you going with this you're early shit?' I said jokingly. 'I quite like winding you up' Finn screamed into my ear. 'Ok thanks mate.' Walking into the living room I seen a tall blonde girl sat crossed legged on the sofa. She turned her head to lock her eyes with mine. It was Brittany. 'What's she doing here?' 'I can't do this I'm sorry I gotta go.' Stuttering I ran out of the living room. 'Santana I'm sorry stay, I didn't set this up, she came this morning we didn't know she was coming.' ' She needed to talk to us.' 'stay so you can work things out with Britt.' Finn grumbled. 'I tried to last night but she didn't want to.' I choked. 'Santana stay please, I've been thinking, we need to talk' Brittany begged. 'You didn't want to last night remember!' 'Yeah but Santana that was last night!' I sat down next to Finn 'Santana I would like to see my daughter?' Brittany murmured. 'The one you walked away from?' 'Not only did you walk away from Ava, you also walked away from me!' I corrected. 'Santana!' 'Be nice ok, we're gonna leave you two to talk and when we get back we want there to be no shouting ok!' Finn shouted as he interrupted.

'Look Brittany to be honest I wanna sort things out about Ava before we sort things out between us.' I warned Brittany. 'Agreed, so she's called Ava, I love that name, it's what we wanted to call our child when we grew up.' 'That's why I called her that, I needed to put a piece of you with her.' I grumbled. 'What does she look like?' Brittany pleaded. I pulled my phone out, to get a picture up, I found the most beautiful one of her with her Nike jumper, jeans and Jordan's. 'Omg Santana she's so beautiful she's a mini you, with her hipster clothes and gestures.' 'She's a mini you as well, she's got your eyes and your nose.' I smirked. 'she's got your lips and your hair, she's so beautiful' 'I went to the doctors when I found out, and he told me there's a 5% chance that I can get a girl pregnant, I guess she's that 5%.' Brittany explained. So she could get someone pregnant, why didn't she try and find me. The anger rose inside of me. 'So you didn't even bother to try and fucking find me?' I shrieked. 'I was scared, I didn't know what to do!' 'So was I, I was fucking scared, I had to bring OUR child up by self!' 'OUR daughter has weight problems, She goes from being underweight to being the right weight!' 'OUR daughter has dyslexia, when she was asking me why she could see her bones or why she always saw letters in her head and why she couldn't write words down properly!' I shouted so loud even the next door neighbour's heard. Shit I wasn't supposed to tell her yet. I clenched my fists as I let out a loud cry. 'I'm so sorry Santana I didn't know, if I knew I would have been there next to you every step of the way!' Brittany pleaded. 'You should have been there in the first place Brittany!' 'Look there's no point in arguing over it, I want you to see Ava, but not straight away.' 'Okay I'm sorry.' Brittany muttered.

'Look I want you both to stay here tonight ok' 'not in the same room if you don't want to, there's a spare room on the right.' Quinn suggested. 'I gotta get back to Ava' 'I called your Mom she said she'd look after her for you.' 'Thanks Quinn a lot' Me and Brittany spoke at the same time, laughing we stared into each other's eyes passionately. 'It's ok we're going to bed, don't do anything your gunna regret.' Quinn demanded.

As Quinn walked out of the room Brittany leaned in for a kiss. Pulling away I mumbled 'Should we be doing this?' 'Look Santana, I lied I still love you.' Brittany groaned. ' I guess we feel the same way.' Brittany leaned back into kiss me, our lips locked as we both smiled while kissing. It's actually happening I'm kissing the girl I've missed for 4 years! Feeling Brittany's tongue touch mine, I groaned then I slid my tongue to touch the roof of Britt's mouth. We both stood up as I pulled away Brittany grabbed my hand and we ran to the spare bedroom. Suddenly Britt picked me up I wrapped my legs around her waist, she opened the door then we started to kiss passionately. My hands slowly felt Brittany's breast. She ripped my top of then my trousers. I then did the same thing to Britt while we both were still kissing. Then I felt Britt's hand rub my clit has I sighed loudly, then Brittany kissed my neck as I sighed again, Brittany slipped two fingers into my pussy as she started to push in slowly, then she started to pump fast and then she started to pump faster. 'Nearly there babe.' Brittany whispered as she felt my breast with her free hand. I groaned as I felt my walls tighten, I arched my back before the orgasm ended. Sighing again Britt pulled her fingers out, I pulled her close and turned her over. Kissing her all over her back, I made my way to her arse, I locked my tongue with her clit then pushing my tongue inside, continually doing this until her walls tightened. Brittany let out the loudest scream, I did it again but with my other hand I rubbed my hand across her pussy. 'Okay babe that's enough for tonight.'


	7. Are we moving to quick?

Chapter 7

Are we moving to quick?

Waking up to the feeling of being cuddled was amazing, I've missed this so much. Brittany had her arm around my waist while holding my hand, her legs cupped with mine, I felt loved again I missed feeling loved, ok Ava loves me but it's not that type of love. I can't deny it I still love Brittany, people make mistakes and I guess walking away from us was hers.

'Morning beautiful!' Brittany whispered as she kissed ear then my lips. 'Morning baby, did you sleep well?' 'Of course I did babe because I was sleeping next to you again, honestly I've missed sleeping next to you, kissing you, holding your hand, seeing your smile first thing in the morning.' 'I also missed when you were so tired and you didn't speak at all!' Britt chuckled. 'Aww babe I same I missed you so much, but no one can find out about last night we went to fast, I loved this but we still gotta talk.' I stuttered. 'Okaii we can talk now' 'Look I want you in Ava's life but she doesn't know you like I know you, I was there since she was born and she knows me as her Mom but I'm sorry your just that Mom she's never met' I stated. A tear fell from Brittany's eye, pulling her close to me, I wrapped my arms around her as I kissed her head. 'I know and I-I-I didn't mean to walk out on you, I was scared!' ' I wanna be a Mom to Ava our child!' Brittany cried. 'Britt I understand, I didn't mean to make it sound like that it's just that she's not going to be ok around you for a while, she has to get used to you.' 'But I know she loves you very much and hasn't stopped loving you, hey why don't me and you go out for lunch today and we'll talk more, right now I gotta go back to my Moms.'

After the conversation that just happened, silence fell into the room and It became seriously awkward. Quickly getting dressed to avoid further conversation, 'I'm going now babe I'll text you later' I said. 'Ok beautiful, yeah text me bye.' Getting in the car I couldn't stop thinking about what had happened last night because I told myself that I wasn't going to let things move fast, but I guess I just wanted to, I have missed Brittany so much. Eventually I picked my phone up to call my Mom. 'Hey, Mom I'm on my way back, how is my princess?' I smiled. 'San, she's just eating her fruit and yogurt.' 'Aw hahah she's so healthy, don't forget to give her, her tablet.' I reminded. 'Don't worry san she remembered, look get back and I'll make you and English muffin and fruit.' 'Ok thanks Mom, I love you' 'I love you to baby.'

'Mommy, I've missed you!' Ava screamed as she jumped into my arms. 'Aww baby I've missed you to, how was your night with Grandma?' I asked Ava as we walked into the kitchen. 'Yeah it was amazing, we played princesses and watched films and made a cake and Uncle Luca came around aswell!' Ava shouted as she got really excited. 'Aww I'm glad you had an amazing time beautiful!' Confused I sat Ava down on my lap. 'So Luca came back to jump on my back and criticize me then?' I barked. 'He found out that he had a niece, but he thought you had her with a man' Mom replied. 'Oh well that's fucking great, why didn't you tell him that it wasn't with a man?' I cried. 'Hey Ava go play with Grandpops' 'look I did Santana, but why give a shit about what he thinks, you are who you are and I love you for it and so does your Dad.' Mom insisted. 'But he's family Mom, family are meant to support each other.' I begged. 'Look san just eat your breakfast, today we'll all go out for dinner ok!' Leaning in for a hug I cried my eyes out. It was still hard knowing that my own brother didn't except me for who I am.

Seeing my Dad play with Ava, was amazing because it showed that I didn't have to move to New York to get away. 'Grandpops, can I get on your shoulders?' Ava asked my Dad 'Of course Av, hop on' Dad smiled. 'Hey how come its Grandpops now?' I laughed. 'San, hey I've always said if I have a granddaughter I want to be called Grandpops' Dad giggled. 'What up Lesbian, how's your fanny licking girlfriend' Luca laughed. 'Luca don't say things like that when my daughters around ok, or just don't say those things at all!' I screamed. 'Ok but its not my fault you like girls, that's what men are for!' Luca laughed again. 'Luca that's enough, if you're going to say things like that to your sister then you're not welcome here anymore' Dad shouted as he strolled up to Luca. 'Luca your sisters been through enough, do you think coming out was easy for her?' Mom bossed. 'Do you think accepting myself was easy?' 'I had to not only come out to my whole family but to my friends as well and guess what that's not easy!' I cried.

'Mommy are you okay?' 'I love you so much!' Ava wept because she heard what had happened and she also seen me cry. 'I'm ok baby, as long as I got you I'm okay!' 'Mommy, you are who you are, don't let no one get you down!' Ava mumbled into my ear. 'Thanks baby, I love you' 'Mommy you got a text of Brittany while you were talking' Ava stated. Wait why did Ava have my phone? Laughing I grabbed it out of her hands trying to avoid her reading it.

Hey babe I miss you already, last night was amazing I couldn't ask for anything better. We still on for lunch? – Brittany

I had totally forgot that we were going out for lunch, but I should really stay and spend some time with Ava.

Hey Britt, something just happened at home and I should stay and look after Ava because she's upset how about tomorrow? – Me

'Mom I just got a text from B-R-I-T-T and last night she asked if we could go out for lunch and talk but I kinda cancelled on her because I wanna stay here with Av is that harsh?' I asked knowing that she'll probs offer to look after Ava while she insists me going. 'No its not harsh but I'm sure she'll understand your child comes first' 'But you can go if you want to I'll look after her.' Mom insisted. 'yeah but its her child as well' 'The child she's never made any effort with or even seen.' Mom demanded. 'don't go for lunch go out for dinner with her tonight' 'we're going out though' 'not any more, I want to see you happy ok'

I guess that's ok, is Av alright? – Brittany

I'm sorry Britt and yeah she's fine, it's just Luca's here and he was being homophobic and Ava heard the family argue and cry she's pretty torn up about it speak tomorrow bye – Me

Later that day I had taken Ava to the park I used to go to whenever I got upset or when I was thinking. There were just so many memories here that I didn't want to remember. Like when I had tried to commit suicide because I was just too scared to accept myself, or like when I had no friends. I don't want that to happen to Ava, I'm going to try my best to make sure that she is always going out with friends and to show her that she is who she is. 'Hey Ava why don't you go on the slide?' I asked because it was my favourite thing as a child. 'Ok Mommy you gotta come down with me' Ava smirked. 'Baby I'm too old now!' I giggled. 'wait no you're only 21 Mommy your still able to go down the slide!' Ava rejoiced. 'Ok baby I'm coming!' 'Do you want get some Ice cream?' Ava nodded as she grabbed my hand. 'with Strawberries and raspberries!' Ava asked. 'What ever you want princess.'

When we got home, I had to get ready to go out. I don't know if you'd call it a date. Should I wear a dress or should I keep it smart but casual? Butterflies were flying around my stomach, my nerves travelled through my body, the thing was I didn't even ask Brittany if she wanted to go out tonight, so I have no clue what her answers going to be. 'Mom do I look ok?' I asked. 'You look beautiful, Britt's going to love it!' Mom replied. 'Thanks, Mom.' I thanked. 'Ava are you ready for bed?' shouting up the stairs as I looked in the mirror. 'Ahh come on then get in princess!' 'Good night baby, I'll see you in the morning, I love you so much!' 'Night Mommy love you to' Ava whispered as I kissed her head and ran my hand through her long silky brown hair.

Knocking on Brittany's door my nerves had gotten worse. 'Santana, what are you doing here?' Brittany gulped. 'I kinda felt bad for not meeting you today, so I just wanted to ask if you wanted to go out for dinner?' I Answered. 'yeah sure, I'll just go get ready.' 'No Britt you don't have to you look so beautiful as you are now!' I persuaded. 'Are you sure, San?' 'Of course I am.'

As we had Arrived at The Fox And Vivian, Brittany kept asking questions about where we were going. There was this nice pub in town, I had to take her somewhere nice and special. 'Omg Santana, this place Is amazing.' Brittany praised. 'I know right I had to take you some where special!' 'I'll go find where our table is.' Should I be scared of this, I honestly don't know because I've known Brittany for 8 years why should I be? 'Hey, guys your table is just over here.' After the waitress had shown us to our table me and Britt ordered our food and drinks.

'Babe I wanted to meet up with you today because I want to be with you again and I want to see Ava, I want us to be a family!' Brittany groaned. 'I want us to be a family as well, but Britt it's been two days, we have to take things slow' 'I really want to see Ava really badly, she's our baby!' Brittany cried. 'Yeah she is but she's not going to be huggy huggy with you like she is with me because she barely knows you' I said as I grabbed her hand. Suddenly, we both leaned forward as our lips touched. We kissed for a few seconds, then Brittany pulled away as she cried 'Santana Lopez, I still love you, I never stopped loving you!'


	8. I missed you

Chapter 8

I missed you.

'Santana stop babe you gotta get back to Ava!'Brittany giggled as she then groaned. As I kissed Brittany's neck I couldn't stop thinking about what could happen in the future like, moving back to New York or having another baby, but then I realised that there was only 5% chance of Brittany actually getting me pregnant again. 'I can't babe, I love you I wanna make you happy!' I said. 'San you do make me happy, it'd make me happy if you go and see our daughter.' Brittany grinned. As I gathered my stuff I kissed Brittany one last time. 'I'm off now babe, I'll text you later.' 'Yeah of course baby, tell me how the little ones doing and Santana Lopez I love you.' 'Miss I love you to!' I screamed back.

As I arrived back home, all I could here was my Dad talk about how much he loved Ava and Ava shouting about princesses and pancakes. 'Is that my daughter talking about princesses again.' I Shouted as I walked into the living room. 'Mommy I missed you, I just helped Grandma make strawberries and chocolate pancakes come and eat them they taste really nice!' Ava screeched. 'Hey baby I missed you to and of course I will.'

'Mom why is it so hard?' 'I really want to introduce B-R-I-T-T to Ava but its way to early.' I sniffled. I knew that it was way too early to introduce Brittany to Ava I just can't wait any longer but I knew I had to. 'I know it is but just think you're doing it for Ava not yourself, San' Mom answered. The words that came out of my Moms mouth really were the truth. 'I guess so, but Mom why is this so hard?' I cried as tears fell from my eyes. 'it's hard because your young and you have a 4 year old daughter and Ava's other 'Mom' has never even seen her, but it's your choice when you want Ava to meet Brittany, you just gotta know if Brittany is faithful in your relationship'. Figuring this out I kinda knew that I have to see if Brittany is going to be a fit mother.

Ava means everything to me, I just wanted the best for her. I love Brittany as well. Every single day of having to see Brittany and Ava at different times, when I just want them to be together. Later that day I got a text of someone who I haven't spoken to in ages.

Whatup Santana Lopez, babe I haven't spoken to you in ages I missed yah gurl, I'm back in Lima and I would like to see you and your little one I'm currently staying at Quinn's.' – Mercedes

Mercedes was one of my gurls that didn't really speak to.

Mercedes yoo I missed you and cool yeah I'll come over to Quinn's now with Ava – Me

Eventually I made my way to Quinn's house to see Mercedes with Ava. 'Mommy why are we going to Quinn's house?' Ava questioned. 'Well baby do you know when I told you about my friends from highschool?' I answered. Ava nodded as she got more interested in what song was on the radio (it was Justin Timberlake mirrors). 'There is a girl I haven't seen in a while that would like to meet you!' I laughed. 'Omg Is she nice Mommy' Ava wondered. ' of course she is otherwise I wouldn't let her see you.'

'Omg Santana she is so beautiful, she looks just like you!' Mercedes screamed as she ran up to me and hugged me like I've been missing for 20 years. Which I know I left for four years but there's a reason for that though. 'Mercedes I've missed you, and yes I guess she is haha.' I sniffled as I sighed in happiness. 'And what's your name beautiful?' Mercede's asked Ava as she lifted her chin to kiss her forehead. 'My name is Ava Marie Lopez and I guess your names Mercede's' Ava giggled as she said Mercede's name wrong. We all burst out laughing as I grabbed Ava's hand. 'That's a lovely name Ava, hey I guess you guys should come in.' We all made our way into the living room as Quinn approached us with a cup of tea for us and juice and strawberries for Ava. Quinn has only known Ava four days and she already knows what her favourite food is. 'Thanks Quinn you're the best!' Ava smirked as she ran and jumped into Quinn's arms. (after Quinn put our tea down).

'Ahhh Ava, I missed you come on sit down and we'll have a little picnic inside okay I'll go grab some sandwiches!' Quinn danced. 'Can Finn come and eat with us?' Ava smiled. 'He'll only come if you ask him, he's in the garage.'

'So Santana how have you been, besides looking after Ava.' 'Well I moved to New York and raised her for four years.' I hated the fact I had to answer that question every time people ask me but I guess have to answer it because I know they will be wondering what has happened when I ran off. 'Aw babe I'm sorry you were alone for four years, if you called me I would of stuck by you from day one.' Mercedes replied 'I know babe I didn't even tell my Mom which I knew wasn't the best idea because I should of told her.' I said as I looked away trying to hold the tears back. 'But Santana me and Finn didn't say anything when we found out, we were there for you babe we still are.' Mercedes reassured as she grabbed my hand and held it tight. 'I know but it was so much easier to run away' 'I didn't want to run away but it's the only thing to do at that time' 'I regret it so much.'

'Mommy Finns here to eat with us.' Ava Joked as she ran straight towards the strawberries! 'Hahah hi Finn and eat your sandwiches before your strawberries!' I shouted jokingly. 'Santana hey how are you?' Finn asked as he grabbed a sandwich and sat next to Quinn. 'I'm fine thanks Finn.' Before I could finish what I was saying Finn had cut in. 'I want both of you to stay round we can watch films and eat popcorn!' 'Mommy please can we stay?' Ava jumped around the room. 'Hmmm baby ehh yeah why not.' I nodded. 'We can all have a sleepover!' Mercedes giggled. 'I guess so Mercedes!' Quinn smiled.

As it became dark we all sat down and watched films, but things didn't feel right without Rachel cutting in wanting to watch Westside Story or Blaine wanting to watch Dirty Dancing (which to be honest is a classic). Sadly it was never going to happen again or could it? Suddenly Ava had cuddled up to me resting her head on my leg with a pillow falling asleep at Frozen in the background. My phone buzzed as I grabbed It to stop it from waking Ava up. I mean who is texting me I haven't got any friends.

Hey San, I just text because I know it's soon but I would like to see Ava tomorrow, I can't wait any longer I want to see our daughter. I love you Santana and I love Ava. – Brittany.

What? Is it too early for Britt to meet Ava? Yes of course it was.

Look Britt I want you to meet Av's but it's way too early but I'll think about it anyway I love you to. – Me

It will make me so happy if you say yes Santana it means everything. – Brittany


End file.
